Dayngrous Discourse

My mom, who shouldn't be flying anywhere (hence my road trip to NC, alone, with two toddlers last Dec) who must have dialysis every other day to survive, is now in Sin City all the way over on the West Coast surrounded by all of Ego's kids - but her one and only child didn't make it on the guest list. Can you say freaking the f@#! out? Yeah, that's exactly what I was doing though I never said a word to my mom because I didn't want to upset her and nothing I was going to say was going to make a difference at this point anyway.

Of course, I slipped in questions here and there about how she'd be getting her medical treatment while she was there and she explained that it was all arranged and she'd be getting her dialysis treatments right on schedule yada yada. I felt a little better, plus, she was there with a ton of people so she'd surely be ok.

Easter Sunday rolled around and I spent the day with my kids out and about. We had an Easter Egg hunt to go to and other fun activities planned. When we arrived home, the kids opened their Easter gifts and we headed outside to play. We were running around in the backyard and later we put on their favorite music and just had some fun.

At about 7:30 PM when I grabbed the phone to make a call I noticed that the caller ID showed a call from my mom's cell at about 7 PM. Since the call came from her cell I assumed she was calling to wish us a Happy Easter so I called her back, without listening to the message (something I regularly do). When I got her voice mail I left a happy, little, upbeat Easter message for her.

About an hour later my phone rang and before I picked it up I noticed it was my mom's cell # on the caller ID. However, it wasn't my mom. It was Ego.

Ego barked at me. He loudly stated he had been calling me all day and left messages. he sounded completely annoyed. Then he told me he was calling me every 15 minutes. Naturally, I explained that it was Easter and I had been out all day with my children. (All the while thinking, why do I need to explain what I do on my own time anyway?!) Ego then informed me that my mom was in the hospital - in Las Vegas. Couldn't he have just cut to the chase and said this in the first 3 seconds of the conversation? WTF!

He goes on to explain that they were all in the casino (big surprise) when my mom started shaking as though she had cold chills. She explained she wasn't feeling well and was going to go up to the room and lay down and that she'd call him if she started feeling worse. After a while, when he went up to check on her he found her passed out and he was unable to rouse her. He stated to me that it was like she was in a coma.

Ok. This is not the first time this has happened to my mom while she's been married to Ego. Knowing this I really have a problem with the fact that out of the 7 people that were there with her, not a single one took the time away from playing slots to go up with my mom. Was gambling so much more important? You see, that is the shit that really f#@%ing pisses me off. That crap wouldn't happen on my watch. There is no way in hell that I would let my mom, who admittedly was feeling badly, go up to her room alone.

Then just as abrubtly as he announced that my mom was in the hospital he tells me that the doctors have told him not to leave her side because she is that critical. I said in complete and utter shock "I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to my mom" and he wasn't in the least bit comforting. His reply was "You? What about me?" Or maybe it was "You? I don't know what I would do!" It was unsettling to say the least.

Then he tells me she is going to be moved to ICU and that he has to go but he'll keep me posted and he hangs up the phone. He didn't even tell me what hospital they were in. For the next 45 minutes I was calling every hospital in LV trying to find my mom. Eventually I called him back. When he picked up the phone he said "I can't talk now. I'm in the room with your mom" and he was ready to hang up. I had to get a word in quickly and ask where they were. He basically told me that he didn't know because it all happened so fast and he rode in the ambulance with her but seriously, you can't push the call button for the nurse and ask what hospital you're in? No really, he couldn't look over at something in the room to give him a clue? Or better yet - if he didn't want to leave her side, why not have one of the 6 other people (his kids and their spouses) traveling with them call me?

I swore I wasn't going to let his attitude and tone piss me off and I convinced myself it was the stress of the situation talking. But, I've got to admit, the more I think about this and the more I look back at things that have transpired, in this instance and others, I am just not so sure he isn't extremely selfish and self-centered.

No offense Ego, but you've been married to her for what now, 2 whole years? This is my mother, I've known her my whole life and believe me when I tell you buddy, you don't love my mom more than I do. If anything happens to my mom, your life goes on. Your family goes on. You have your two sons, two daughters-in-law, your daughter and your son-in-law, plus all of your grandchildren. If something happens to my mom, I have no one but me and my two babies. Doesn't that register with you? I'm not saying you won't be broken hearted or even a little lonley but it's like comparing apples to oranges. Talk to me like this is my mother we're talking about. Show a little sensitivity, a little compassion, a little concern for me too. I am just as stressed as you are except I am not surrounded by family to comfort me through this traumatic time. Don't f#@!ing cut me short or cut me off that shit isn't going to fly with me.

At about 11:00 PM EST she was conscious but too weak to talk. Late Sunday night she was stable and sleeping. Monday morning at 5 AM when I talked to her nurse she had improved compared to Sunday. However, about midnight Monday, Ego called to tell me she had taken a turn for the worst. She had to be put on a ventilator.

So here I am, 2854.6 miles away from my mom, no money for a plane ticket and no one to watch my toddlers even if I could fly to Nevada and find a place to stay for as long as it took to hold my mom's hand until she was ready to fly back to NC. What the hell am I supposed to do now besides lose my mind?